For some reason young children often find it hard to apologise. Things get out of hand when they’re playing and the next thing you know one feels so aggrieved about something the other has done that she throws a toy at him, he reacts to this and throws six back.

Both feel completely justified and, when you hear the commotion and go to sort it out both turn the tears on and appear equally upset.

Often it’s impossible to work out, between the snuffles and sobs, what singular action set the chain of angry events in motion.

A request for them to apologise to each other is met with fierce resistance. It’s ironic really because, later in life, we British become so apologetic that someone could stand on our foot and we would say, “I’m sorry, please would you mind not breaking my toes.”

Eventually one might manage a hugely begrudging “so_reee” and very soon the normal order of things has been returned.

When it comes to business a simple mistake or even an inadvertent mismatch between what you’re offering and what your customer considers reasonable can lead to problems.

An angry customer is bad news. Emotions are what drive behaviour and it’s understandable that people who feel aggrieved should let you know. And if they don’t you may well never realise that someone is out there refusing to use you again and telling everyone you know how awful your company is.

But when someone contacts you to tell you they’re not happy what’s the best thing to do?

Many companies are quick to offer a partial refund in the hope that this will appease the injured party.

However, new research by a consumer behaviour expert from Nottingham University has found that a financial response might not be the best option.

Researchers worked alongside a high volume EBay trader and tested alternative responses to customers who left neutral or negative feedback.

Some were offered a partial refund as a good will gesture if they would consider withdrawing their feedback.

Others were sent an apology that blamed the manufacturer for the delay and added, “We are very sorry and want to apologise for this.”

The outcome?

Only 23% of those who received the partial refund withdrew their feedback, whereas 45% of those who received the apology opted to do so.

So what’s going on?

It could be that an apology triggers unconscious associations with forgiveness. It’s also possible that the refund is seen as a tacit acknowledgement that the problems experienced by the customer are not uncommon.

Might it be that the apology referencing the manufacturer feels more unique and doesn’t provide the same degree of indirect social proof that this company screws up quite often?

The mention of the manufacturer also creates an empathetic link between the customer and retailer: essentially the retailer is saying that they are just as much the victim as the customers.

Whatever the reason, what’s important to recognise is that not only will offering a refund or partial refund cost you money, in some circumstances at least, your customer may well have felt more positive about you – and therefore more likely to use you again – if they received a good apology.

Which raises the question; what is a good apology?

I’ll discuss that next time.

Source: University of Nottingham (2009, September 23). Saying Sorry Really Does Cost Nothing. ScienceDaily. Retrieved September 28, 2009, from http://www.sciencedaily.com­/releases/2009/09/090923105815.htm

Image courtesy: sarit